The Shock: Las Vegas
Laying on my recliner, like I do every night, trying desperately to get my mind to stop and my eyes to close with no success, I open my facebook app. "Please pray for us," comes across my screen from a dear friend in Las Vegas. I shake it off for the moment, not entirely sure if that was what I actually read (exhaustion sometimes makes me imagine things.) Like I do every night, I grab the remote to find a monotonous show to help me sleep, Oh look, Dateline is on MSNBC, perfect.
Not so perfect!
Suddenly to my shock and dismay I see the place I grew up in, the streets I've walked, the land that grew me into the person I am, completely under siege. My mind goes back to that facebook post and my heart sinks.
This has taken the breath out of me. It has shaken me to the core. Its not as though these disgusting events have never impacted me, I am an emotional person and pain and fear always has an impact on me. Sandy Hook broke my heart in ways I cannot even explain. This time though, this time it is different.
I didn't sleep at all that night, barely ate the next day. I've spent hours refreshing the facebook feed just hoping that people I care about will mark themselves safe. I've cried, I've screamed. Las Vegas, love it or hate it, raised me. The majority of the first 26 years of my life were spent in that town. I was born in Women's Hospital (which no longer exists) in the winter of 1981. Most of my education came from Las Vegas Public schools, most of my memories were created in the town that grew me and the majority of the people I can honestly call friends live there. Several family member still reside there and people who have known me my entire life are there, in the town that made me.
I've sat and watched people post things about race, stating it only matters because white people were attacked. I cannot tell you how that hurts my heart. One of the most beautiful things about Las Vegas is that it is not a racist place. We grew up in diverse neighborhoods and never had a second thought about what our neighbors looked like. Many of us have dated out of our race and never used the word interracial or even acknowledged that there was a difference. I understand that racism exists everywhere, but it is not the overall attitude or general environment in Las Vegas. Any event you attend from a rap concert to a country show, always has an attendance of people from all races and all walks of life. The people hurt and the ones no longer living, they are not just white. They are humans, our fellow man, our neighbors. They come from towns all over the map and a large number of ethnic backgrounds. They came to enjoy some music and have a great time. They weren't there to discuss race or politics, they weren't at a rally for the president. I wish people would stop making it seem as so. The Vegas I will always love and admire, the part of Vegas I miss, is the Vegas that accepts everyone and embraces the world as one people.
I've done nothing but reflect on this since the moment my eyes caught the tv screen. I am hurt. I feel partially broken. I am worried about the few people we have yet to hear from but I am also proud! Proud to see the blood banks so full of donations that they simply cannot take any more. So proud to see people, no matter where they come from, join together to care for each other and care for Vegas.
My Uncle informed me that My Aunt and cousin had gotten lucky and been able to get a hold of tickets to the show at the last minute. Now my Uncle, being the man he is and knowing his daughter had a college test the next day, somehow convinced them not to go. I keep thanking God for that. My cousin has friends who were injured though. Another cousin was leaving work at the time, which is right in the area, she witnessed people running, people hiding. That will haunt her. So many of my friends have lost someone they care about or they are watching someone they care about suffer through injury. Others I know well are working the front lines, police officers, nurses and hospital employees. This touches us all.
My family who is still there and many who are not, my mother, myself, we have countless ties to the town that grew us. Friends, family and memories. I live 2000 miles away now, nearly everyone I know has a tie to Las Vegas. Maybe they have a family member living there, maybe it's their favorite place to vacation, maybe they lived there once or dream of living there someday. They have a tie, a connection, something that bonds them to that bright spot in the desert. We have all been hit. We have all taken an indirect hit from a bullet. If you have no ties, it still impacts you, this is the country you live in and if it's not, well we all live on the same Earth.
I can't describe my feelings in a way that accurately depicts them. I can't describe the shear anger I feel at people who think this is a fine time to jump on the platform they built for themselves and disrespect every individual victim with their political and racial rhetoric. These people who want to play a game of semantics rather than focus on the tragedy at hand. Those who chose to start spouting conspiracy theories the moment a gun goes off. All you are doing is disrespecting every victim, disrespecting every person who was in that crowd, every officer who has worked since the first call, every nurse and Dr and hospital employee who has had very little time to breath or even process. You are taking away from every citizen who has a heart and every person who feels pained. You are stripping families of the right to grieve and telling them that their pain does not matter.
It is time to stop fighting against each other, it is time to stop hurting each other. The only way we combat domestic terrorism, the only way we find healing, the only way we stop people from killing each other is to join hands and fight with each other!
Please take some time and read what my fellow writers have to say! This has touched so many and we all have a different personal experience.
Trying to Process it All
My Hometown is Hurting
Not so perfect!
Suddenly to my shock and dismay I see the place I grew up in, the streets I've walked, the land that grew me into the person I am, completely under siege. My mind goes back to that facebook post and my heart sinks.
This has taken the breath out of me. It has shaken me to the core. Its not as though these disgusting events have never impacted me, I am an emotional person and pain and fear always has an impact on me. Sandy Hook broke my heart in ways I cannot even explain. This time though, this time it is different.
I didn't sleep at all that night, barely ate the next day. I've spent hours refreshing the facebook feed just hoping that people I care about will mark themselves safe. I've cried, I've screamed. Las Vegas, love it or hate it, raised me. The majority of the first 26 years of my life were spent in that town. I was born in Women's Hospital (which no longer exists) in the winter of 1981. Most of my education came from Las Vegas Public schools, most of my memories were created in the town that grew me and the majority of the people I can honestly call friends live there. Several family member still reside there and people who have known me my entire life are there, in the town that made me.
I've sat and watched people post things about race, stating it only matters because white people were attacked. I cannot tell you how that hurts my heart. One of the most beautiful things about Las Vegas is that it is not a racist place. We grew up in diverse neighborhoods and never had a second thought about what our neighbors looked like. Many of us have dated out of our race and never used the word interracial or even acknowledged that there was a difference. I understand that racism exists everywhere, but it is not the overall attitude or general environment in Las Vegas. Any event you attend from a rap concert to a country show, always has an attendance of people from all races and all walks of life. The people hurt and the ones no longer living, they are not just white. They are humans, our fellow man, our neighbors. They come from towns all over the map and a large number of ethnic backgrounds. They came to enjoy some music and have a great time. They weren't there to discuss race or politics, they weren't at a rally for the president. I wish people would stop making it seem as so. The Vegas I will always love and admire, the part of Vegas I miss, is the Vegas that accepts everyone and embraces the world as one people.
I've done nothing but reflect on this since the moment my eyes caught the tv screen. I am hurt. I feel partially broken. I am worried about the few people we have yet to hear from but I am also proud! Proud to see the blood banks so full of donations that they simply cannot take any more. So proud to see people, no matter where they come from, join together to care for each other and care for Vegas.
My Uncle informed me that My Aunt and cousin had gotten lucky and been able to get a hold of tickets to the show at the last minute. Now my Uncle, being the man he is and knowing his daughter had a college test the next day, somehow convinced them not to go. I keep thanking God for that. My cousin has friends who were injured though. Another cousin was leaving work at the time, which is right in the area, she witnessed people running, people hiding. That will haunt her. So many of my friends have lost someone they care about or they are watching someone they care about suffer through injury. Others I know well are working the front lines, police officers, nurses and hospital employees. This touches us all.
My family who is still there and many who are not, my mother, myself, we have countless ties to the town that grew us. Friends, family and memories. I live 2000 miles away now, nearly everyone I know has a tie to Las Vegas. Maybe they have a family member living there, maybe it's their favorite place to vacation, maybe they lived there once or dream of living there someday. They have a tie, a connection, something that bonds them to that bright spot in the desert. We have all been hit. We have all taken an indirect hit from a bullet. If you have no ties, it still impacts you, this is the country you live in and if it's not, well we all live on the same Earth.
I can't describe my feelings in a way that accurately depicts them. I can't describe the shear anger I feel at people who think this is a fine time to jump on the platform they built for themselves and disrespect every individual victim with their political and racial rhetoric. These people who want to play a game of semantics rather than focus on the tragedy at hand. Those who chose to start spouting conspiracy theories the moment a gun goes off. All you are doing is disrespecting every victim, disrespecting every person who was in that crowd, every officer who has worked since the first call, every nurse and Dr and hospital employee who has had very little time to breath or even process. You are taking away from every citizen who has a heart and every person who feels pained. You are stripping families of the right to grieve and telling them that their pain does not matter.
It is time to stop fighting against each other, it is time to stop hurting each other. The only way we combat domestic terrorism, the only way we find healing, the only way we stop people from killing each other is to join hands and fight with each other!
Please take some time and read what my fellow writers have to say! This has touched so many and we all have a different personal experience.
Trying to Process it All
My Hometown is Hurting
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